Friday, August 06, 2004

what is the meaning of life?

what is the meaning of life?
what do i hope to gain by going to columbia? after working for almost 3 months at my internship (not that it's a bad company or anything, actually it's great and has been invaluable experience) i've pretty much concreted that there are much better things for me out there or at least for me to be satisfied doing with my life.

yesterday i attended University North Florida's law school + LSAT orientation workshop. i was in a room with about 10 other people ranging from college seniors to those that have decided that they are ready for a profession change. i have decided that the LSAT is one of the easiest tests i've ever seen, but. that's aside from the point. we had a sample question posed to us early.
"insurance company finds that the percentage of red cars in fatal acidents is higher than other cars, thus they want to ban the manufacturing of red cars. what is the flaw in the argument from the insurance company? a. b. c. d. e.? " - i can tell you that without even seeing the answers, most of us could have come up with the right answer. in our workshop the woman to my left answered choice e, that it is flawed because the statement does not give definitive percentages on red cars in accidents. the guy behind me answered b. that the logic is flawed because not all car accidents result in fatalities. 50% of our class got the answer wrong, these, are our lawyers and politicians of tommorow. obviously the answer is that that the insurance comp's claim does not address that aggressive drivers may be more inclined to buy red cars.

ok where am i going with this? our county has more than its share of doctors, lawyers, and other professionals. they all make a good sum of money, but none of them truly needed to goto an ivy league school, they predominantly graduated from UF and FSU. did i go to columbia to take a path towards the same end point?

i very much respect everyone of these professionals. they are the doctors who take care of me when i'm sick and when i was a kid, they are the dentist who filled my cavities, they are the lawyer who got me out of my traffic ticket. everyone of these people has made their impact in their community and that is a great service. why then do we go to a school of the best of the best if we do not intend to be destined for things held by the best of the best?

why do we exist then? i was thinking this on the way home as i worked far past my normal work hours on a friday. everyone i work with is working in order to make it to tommorow, everyone is working for money. is that all there is to life then, to make money so that we can accumulate it and then pass what is left to our children and then die? is it the human condition to exist in our little bubbles of existence, a ripple in an infintely large pond. i think everyone who has questioned this, whether it be at columbia or at any school for that matter is destined for something else away from the grind of things. i cannot let myself believe that the meaning of life is solely, to exist. i don't want to leave my undergraduate life preparing for 30 years of the daily grind, for what purpose? did i spend $40k a year to become the best developed intellectual mind that i could be just to be in the same position as someone who just fucked away at life? at this level of education, which is supposed to be higher education, i hope that i, i hope that we aspire to and become more than living and working to make it to the next day. I hope we are the ones who seek to make the world a better place, we are the ones who change the face of social welfare, we are the ones who shake the earth instead of merely treading on it.

they asked the interns what they expected from their jobs, 60% wanted to be rich, the rest of us wanted to help people and change the world.

EDIT: anyways, so my point was that, if i was going to goto law school it wouldn't be to become a lawyer, it'd be to become a politician. not duval county school board representative, i want to heal the world, not michael jackson style.